Too Much

It's been too much. Too much summer. Too many hours spent with small children and too few moments of quiet.

We have thirty days until BW and JB return to school. Sadly though, my semester starts the same day they return and I am in need of a break away from JB and BW before the chaos of fall starts again.

Last summer was hectic, juggling a physics class, AunT's estate, the house, the children, making time for Charles and myself. It seemed to pass so quickly. Without the distractions of school or the estate this summer has been far more challenging. Time is crawling by leaving me to focus on how much is too much...

Too many hours of bickering, fighting whining and tears.

Too much drama of "He said this" or "She said that".

Too much whining and pleading after having been told no.

Too many "Mama?", "Mama!" and "MAAAA-MAAA"s.

Too many "I'm hungry", "I want a snack", "When is lunch", "When is dinner", and "Can we have dessert"?

Too many meals of "I don't like this", "That's disgusting" or "Ewww, gross".

Too many fast food dinners.

Too many nights interrupted with "I had a scary dream", "I can't sleep", and "I want some water" at 4 am.

Too many naps where bickering woke me up too soon.

Too many books set down and not picked up again because I need to clean up something since "That wasn't such a good idea was it mama?"

Too many afternoons filled with thunderstorms.

Too many nights of lightening and rain.

Too many outings canceled because of inclement weather.

Too many projects that need focus but couldn't be addressed due to all the 'too manys'.

Too many two-legged and four-legged children under my feet, every moment of every day.

Too many hours away from Charles, envious of the time he gets to spend with adults.

Maybe it's just been too much for today that I'm having a difficult time seeing the good parts - I know they are there.

The children are tan and confident in the water from the swimming lessons they've enjoyed this summer. BW has enjoyed several Cub Scout activities and is about to head out for a father-son Cub Scout camping trip. His confidence in himself has deepened and his friendships with children his age have grown stronger and will likely last into adulthood. JB has grown into a graceful spirit and vastly enjoys her ballet and tap classes. Her relationships with her friends has blossomed and she's now eager and confident enough to enjoy sleepovers without late night calls to rescue her. Neither one of them has suffered from any major catastrophes, unlike last year.

The garden looks better than it has in a few years and the perennial beds are almost under control again. On nights when we don't have thunderstorms and lightening, Charles and I are able to lounge on the deck and enjoy a quiet moment or two before the children discover where we are.

On days like this though where we have spent too much time together it is hard to keep perspective. I need focus on the good moments and make the time we have left work for us. Wish me luck that we survive the next few weeks and make the summer a fun one to remember.